*BEER VS PUSSY*

1. Beer is always wet. PUSSY needs a little work.
One point to BEER

2. Warm beer tastes awful.
One point to PUSSY

3. A really cold beer is satisfying.
One point to BEER

4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit.
One point to PUSSY

5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of PUSSY your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances.
I'll just call it a DRAW for the time
being.

6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten PUSSY's in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere.
One point to PUSSY

7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any PUSSY in public, you become a legend.
One point to PUSSY

8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of PUSSY he may buy you a beer.
One point to PUSSY

9. You normally don't find old beer.
One point to BEER

10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much PUSSY and you'll think you've seen God.
One point to PUSSY

11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun.
One point to PUSSY

12. In most countries there's a tax on beer.
One point to PUSSY

13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off.
One point to BEER

14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can.
One point to BEER

15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down.
One point to BEER

16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc.
One point to BEER

17. You always know how much beer is going to cost.
One point to BEER

18. Beer doesn't have a mother.
One point to BEER

19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it.
One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 PUSSY: 8

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is:
BEER