*GLOBAL WARMING IS COMING!!*

iikka: global warming is coming the day after tomorrow
dieselguy296: is it
iikka: yep, it just called me and said so
dieselguy296: have you seen that movie
iikka: i dont know how in the world it got my number though??
dieselguy296: I gave it to it
iikka: thanks a lot tard, now global warming is going to be stalking me
iikka: did you give it my home address too?
dieselguy296: No, I don't know that one
iikka: good
dieselguy296: but I did give it your IP address
iikka: dont
iikka: ever
iikka: i have a security system at all my addresses (yes even my ip) so i can tell when global warming is coming
dieselguy296: perfect
dieselguy296: its actually supposed to cool down over the next couple of days
iikka: if i can im going to get an order of protection against it
dieselguy296: good
iikka: i think yesterdays 113 was just what it needed
dieselguy296: get a restraining order on it, restraining it from coming with in 500 yards of you or your family
iikka: that should keep me quite safe
dieselguy296: yes
iikka: how did global warming contact you in the first place??
dieselguy296: well me and global warming are friends, I ran into it the other day and it said it really liked my truck and so we started hanging out
dieselguy296: so I had it call you just so it could scare you
iikka: yeah im sure global warming loves your truck
iikka: thanks man
iikka: i thought we were friends
iikka: and you go and put global warming on me?!
dieselguy296: then I gave it your ip address so it could definitely get in touch with you
iikka: we're family for fucks sake
dieselguy296: dude, it was supposed to be a practical joke
iikka: fine im going to switch my ip address now then
iikka: its not, global warming is taking this VERY SERIOUSLY!!
dieselguy296: global warming is much like robin, they both seem fiine but then get carried away when they are drunk
iikka: threats, pipebombs...
dieselguy296: I know
iikka: yeah well global warming is NEVER allowed to come in my house drunk, i dont want it peeing anywhere
dieselguy296: wait I told global warm not to use pipe bombs
iikka: no i bet the pipe bombs were your idea!
iikka: is robin friends with global warming too??
dieselguy296: No I said absolutely no pipe bombs, and he doesn't even know how much trouble he is getting into if he crosses mike
dieselguy296: No, they got in a huge fight over the correct way to make nachos
iikka: yeah exactly, when he gets back from ny and he finds out what global warming has been doing to harrass me...
dieselguy296: Robin was threatened by global warming
dieselguy296: seriously
iikka: global warming is into mexican food?
iikka: well i guess that kinda makes the most sense
dieselguy296: hell yeah that shit is hot as hell they way global warming makes it
iikka: hmm...maybe i should go to dinner with global warming, let it make me some tacoriffics!!
iikka: and then for dessert we'll have flantastic
dieselguy296: dude, global warming will just get drunk and hit on you
iikka: no drinking for it then
dieselguy296: its hard to keep it from drinking
dieselguy296: seeing as how it is the brain child of Al Gore, wouldn't you drink if you were Al Gore's child
iikka: yeah having a father figure like that sure would fuck you up and give you some problems
dieselguy296: seriously
iikka: now ive gotta call al and complain!
iikka: i havent spoken with al, personally, well...ever
dieselguy296: and then everyone in the world says either you suck or don't exist, the poor thing must have some serious problems
iikka: dont go making me feel bad for global warming!
dieselguy296: thats why I was trying to be-friend it
iikka: its threatening me!
dieselguy296: global warming is just anti social, and awkward kinda like ethan, so I can relate
iikka: and i really like my cell # i dont want to have to change it
dieselguy296: true
iikka: yeah well unlike ethan global warming is not my neighbor, and i dont WANT it to be
dieselguy296: global warming is everyones neighbor
dieselguy296: its like Jesus
iikka: it has to exist because at least one person believes in it?
iikka: or it has cool powers and can part the red sea
iikka: hahaha now this is just a big joke
iikka: b/c i know that was moses
iikka: and if dodo were here i could say, jesus moses, who cares, they're both mehicano naaames
dieselguy296: si es correcto
dieselguy296: I'm just saying yeah at least one person believes in it, but our president refuses to
iikka: well give global warming HIS number so he can go scare him
dieselguy296: I don't have the presidents number and well as cool as I am I just don't have everyone's number
iikka: you should probably try harder then
dieselguy296: yeah whatever